Like I’ve mentioned before, my menstrual cycle was very predictive. I almost always knew what day my period is expected to come every month.
And July that year, was very a difficult month for me both emotionally and mentally. Mainly, because of the IUI fail and then having that bigger breast situation. I was just so conflicted about what signs Allaw SWT was giving me. I just didn’t know what to think anymore.
July 18th was the day I was expected to have my next period according to my calendar and that Ovulation calculating app I’ve been using.
The night before, I looked up the purpose of performing Tahjjud prayer. I originally heard the name of the prayer from my mother who has done it a few times, but I never inquired about it. From what I read, the Tahjjud prayer is a nafl prayer that is generally performed during the last third of the night.
Our Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said “Our Lord, the Blessed, the Superior, comes down every night to the nearest Heaven to us when the last third of the night remains. Saying ‘is there anyone to invoke me? So I may respond to invocation? Is there anyone to ask me, so that I may grant him his request? Is there anyone seeking my forgiveness, so that I may forgive him?” (Sahih al-Bakhari 1145)
Subhan’Allah, after reading about this I was convinced that Hubby and I just had to perform this prayer the night before July 18th. I remember waking Hubby up that night, sometime between 2-3am telling him about this prayer and how important it was for us to perform it. Ofcourse, as sleepy as he was, he agreed without hesitation. And we both poured our hearts and souls into the Tahjjud prayer. I’ve never prayed so hard in my life, untill that very night.
Right after performing that prayer, I just could’t go back to sleep. I couldn’t turn my mind off. It was racing a mile a minute. I really wanted to just go ahead and take that